As the events of Monday, April 16, 2007 unfolded in Blacksburg, Virginia, I couldn't help feeling. I only say "feeling" because the emotion I possessed during the hours of news coverage and climbing number of fatalities could not be expressed in a single emotion. I felt scared. I felt hurt. I felt hopeless. I was not having trouble comprehending what was on the television screen, it was more the utter disbelief and shock in the way it happened. It also brought me back to two other significant events, during which I would convey similar "feelings".
September 11, 2001 is obviously a day that will never fade in the minds of any American. I had a tie to that day because my mother would have perished if she had retained her job at the World Trade Center instead of staying home to raise first me, then my two siblings afterwards. My father, at the time, was a Captain in the NYPD Transit Bureau. He happened to be at a business meeting in Baltimore that week. He probably would have been lost as well, most likely in the collapse of one of the two towers. I felt these same "feelings" that day. It was a sense that the world was crashing down, and that there was nothing I could do. It changed things. It's still changing things.
Two years later, in the Summer of 2003, we experienced a monumental blackout in the Eastern region of the country. Millions completely lost power, with no no warning, and no answers as to why. Still in the wake of 9/11, many assumed terrorism, and I for one, was a part of that camp in the onset. In the end, we all would get our power back, and apparently were not attacked by terrorists afterall, but that feeling was still there. That unexplainable emotion that it was all coming to an end. That sense of hopelessness.
And now, I will reflect on April 16, 2007 with the same sense of "feeling", probably for the rest of my life. It is going to change things. It may have changed me. I know it changed the lives of 25,000 students and members of faculty at Virginia Tech, as well as the families of all the deceased and wounded, all of whom, my thoughts and prayers go out to.
I guess this is more of a summarization for me, as I have not had the opportunity to really take in all that has happened, at least not all at once. It was not too long ago that my friends and I were foolishly discussing our disdain for the University's athletic program, as they had "abandoned" the Big East Conference just a couple years ago for the Atlantic Coast Conference. Now, I look back at that and wouldn't even imagine it. Sadly, it takes tragedy sometimes to really put things into perspective, and this one was no exception. My emotional state did grow worse with the notification of each death, but my scope of what mattered and didn't matter seemed to come into focus at the same time. What if the same horrific events would ever (God forbid) occur on my own campus? What would I do? I still have no idea. I just know that I mourn for these students at Virginia Tech just as I would my own classmates.
We are one now, and if I could do anything for these families, their friends, the University, I would, because that is all that matters right now. I am praying for those who are dealing with injuries as a result of this catastrophe. My thoughts are with the families, though I know it cannot replace what they have lost, I pray they may find the strength to carry on. I pray for those who tragically passed, hoping for their happiness in an afterlife, as we mourn for the fact that they were removed from this life all too soon. I pray for the friends and acquaitences, as well as the student body of Virignia Tech University. As a junior in high school, we lost a member of our educational community, and more importantly a good person to a sudden and tragic death while school was in session. I remember the hurt, the pain, and the sorrow of myself and those around me. I still cannot begin to imagine your pain, but hope you can find the strength to cope with what has happened. I also pray for the rest of the country, maybe even the world. May we all see these horrific events, and be able to deal with the country and world in their wake. May we all take steps to consider our actions more closely, and to value what we have more dearly.
You all have my thoughts and prayers. I grieve with you and for you. May the victims of these events remain in our hearts and minds, to honor their memory.
